While examining our flanks during an early morning strategic defence review with the Official DPPF Mrs at the weekend, we decided that this years Brucie Bonus from the Official Employer should be spent on the following.
1. A new Epilady for the Official DPPF Mrs's flanks.
2. A massive boat with loads of guns and some depth charges.
We have sanctioned £19.99 to be spent procuring item one from E-Bay. We have also managed to strike a deal with the Royal Navy for a Type 4 Frigate. The Frigate is to patrol our water front on the River Weaver and protect our eastern flank.
We will be buying a bottle of Lambrusco from Bargain Booze this week and will be holding a naming ceremony by the Blue Bridge at the weekend. We are currently debating a name for our new flagship. After a heated debate we have chosen either HMS Carnage or HMS Fairy Princess .
We be contacting the Waterways to see if they can extend Vale Royal Locks and lend us a Dredger.
Our new ship yesterdayWe shall also be contacting local anglers to discuss the effects of fouling our propellers with mono filament and the effects of a depth charge on a freshly ground baited swim.
4 comments:
That's not a type 4 frigate. A type 4 has never been in service. You're making this up!
The type 4 frigate was a secret development by the UK government. It can also go under water and fly. It has a sauna and massage parlour that does extra's.
LRDG sez, not sure will contact my CPO matey to discuss.....'jack likes a good time' having said that the shippers on board look a bit tidgy....could it be a mini me u boot about to go down on the rowing club? oo er
Now where's me black forrest gattux...it's blowin a hooly in the mornin i shippers i
LRDG,
It's a question of perspective. I'll explain the difference between things that are small and things which are faraway at Thursdays training session.
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