We reckon that a Turkey traveling somewhere between the speed of sound and warp factor 1 would make a formidable secret weapon. Using our trusted 'line of chavs' weapons testing theory, we have managed to calculate that for the given velocities an 8 pound balistic butterball should take out between 72 and 26,141 sequential chavs and possibly penetrate the most heavily modified Saxo. Indeed, it could be argued that, by developing an advanced range of stuffings, the humble fowl could be used to deliver anything from sage and onion to a full nuclear payload.
Hands up to those pesky yanks for developing the Turkey Cannon.
A Turkey Cannon yesterday
The ruse is that the tube is filled with booze and inserted up the birds Gary Glitter. When cooked in the oven, or on the BBQ, the liquid serves to keep the birds inner sanctum moist.
We reckon that if the tube is filled with 2:1 stoichiometric mixture of hydrogen and oxygen and then heated, the resulting explosion should propell the poultry at a respectable velocity.
We may even invite the UN weapons inspectors round in the summer and they can watch while we stuff our booze filled probe into our bird and give it a good roasting in the garden.
We shall be trying to work out what $18.99c is in real money in the morning. Oh, and where we can get some hydrogen from.
3 comments:
Looks like you're on a winner Foxy.
4H + O2 = 2H20
Brillant. Rocket propulsion and still keeping the bird moist.
There's a Nobel peace prize in this one.
Keep up the good work Foxy.
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